Why you lost.

After the recent (and very good) English GT I found myself doing something I dislike in general but really annoys me in gaming and that's whining.
It's something I try to avoid but occasionally catch myself doing (before you say it ranting and whining are completely different things). I I lose a a game as I have been known to do from time to time, I try and take it on the chin, learn from it, and then move on. This doesn't always go as planned and I find myself sounding like a spoilt brat who didn't get the right colour pony.

So I'm going to try and run through some common whines that I've used and heard and explain why they're total bollocks.

1) My deck hated me... Basically you didn't get the cards you wanted when you wanted. Well that's why you have a control hand, if you made a plan without the resources to carry it out it was always a bad plan.

2) THEIR deck hated me. If you're opponent is hitting all their TNs and it feels like they're always flipping high for damage then good for them, there's a good chance they were magically in the right position to use this "luck" ignoring the fact that they have the same number of cards as you and the same chance of flipping what they need. Too often the player whose worked hardest and not relied on luck will seem the luckiest.

3) Nothing decent in my hand. So don't use it to cheat then, go defensive, focus your attacks and use your head to stay out of trouble. You know at the beginning of a round what cards you have so work out how best to use them.

4) That model is OP! And so what? Its  not going to sneak up on you is it? Do your research, read up before you run off and play. Look at strong models and think "if this comes up how would I stop it?" Then when it comes up at the start of a game ( the very start before you deploy you know what you are facing remember) have a plan.

5) This model in so underpowered! This one is very simple, stop moaning and use something else. There's plenty to choose from.

I think I'll leave it the but there are plenty more whines that float around and like I said as much as I dislike them I just as guilty of them. But really we shouldn't do it because it disrespectful to your opponent. It make you sound like a brat and most importantly its REALLY annoying.

My First Adventure With Warhammer Quest: Silver Tower

Mechanical Dove

So I stopped playing Warhammer and Warhammer 40K over three years ago now.

I got my first box of Chaos Space Marines when I was finishing primary school and have some really fond memories of playing Warhammer and 40K while growing up.  I never played competitively, but played regularly with a group of my best friends; three- or four-player games, using VHS boxes for terrain, you name it.

Well, lots of things change over time and as you grow up.  Warhammer and 40K, in particular, became game systems I started to dislike; the amount of painting required was sickening, notwithstanding the cost of the miniatures and the baffling changes to the rules over the last few years.  The 40K battles my friends and I waged on the few times a year we used to meet up, after moving to different parts of the country, became less enjoyable.

I think, ultimately, the process of playing these games was far too different from the times we played together back in school.  We’d moved on, or Games Workshop had; either way, we had to find other game systems.  For our hobbying time and friendships, moving onto Malifaux, Dropzone Commander, Guild Ball and Bushido, amongst others, did wonders.

Stay with me...

Guildball Battle Report: Shark vs Fillet

Insidiously Mad

This was the second game of the evening, but both our phones were dead during the first game so we decided to just do a battle report for the second game instead so we could have some pictures. I am still trying to figure out my tournament 8 for my first event at the end of July (there will be an article coming on this) so decided to try out my current idea for a 2 takeout 2 goal lineup.

I went with: Shark, Salt, Jac, Sakana, Gutter and Fangtooth
Ross (@thedicegod on twitter) went with Fillet, Princess, Shank, Boiler, Gutter and Rage
He won the roll off and chose to receive.

Turn 1: 

The water is fast terrain and the black patch on my right flank is slow terrain

I decided to kick off with Gutter so I could threaten pulling in whoever he went to pick the ball up with. The plan was to drag them in, push them to the edge of the board and have Jac knock them off the pitch. This is my first time trying this on the kick off with Gutter and I definitely screwed it up... Boiler went and grabbed the ball and put marked target on Gutter (making it so she was now in charge range of Fillet). I decided the risk was still worth it so walked her up a bit, chain grabbed boiler, tackled the ball and pushed him twice so he was within an inch of the board edge. Unluckily it meant I had no momentum, but Jac would be able to push Boiler of the pitch on the charge quite easily.

Fillet then charged in (uhoh) and immediately tore Gutter into pieces, putting Ross up 2-0. Damn. With Fillet near the edge of the board as well there as a chance I could charge her and get both Boiler and her off the pitch with Jac, but I decided it was too risky. Instead I charge Boiler, needing 3 4s on 9 dice to knock him off the pitch. ... and I failed. Crap. Now Jac had no momentum (so couldnt use heroic to get him off the board and was standing right by boiler and fillet for next turn.. We both then shuffled around the rest of our players not doing much before Shark decided to try and finish off Boiler. I charge in, rolling 11 dice needing 5 4's to knock him off the pitch and... failed again. Crap! This turn was not going well. I used pretty much all my influence to get him off the pitch and failed. I could have gone after the ball (which was just sitting there) instead and tried to get enough momentum to win iniative, charge rage, bounce and score with shark, but I thought I might be able to do that as well as get boiler off the pitch. Blowing the charge stopped that however. I did at least manage to Gut & String him with that charge though so he was no df 3. I decided to pump in my last remaining 5 influence hoping to get 5 hits with 7 dice (needing 3s now) and finally managed it with my final influence, evening up the score at 2-2. I think we were pretty close on momentum,

Giving my table some colour

In my last blog post you saw the first quarter of my board starting to take shape. Due to the narrow confines of the canals I knew that I would need to start painting the pieces before I could actually glue them down.

I spent quite a bit of time looking at photos of bricks and drifted back and forth on colour choices. One problem that many city tables end up with is having a table that has too many grey tones. This quickly looks dull and loses the viewer's interest. So I settled on classic red clay bricks as the foundation for my city. This would create a warm tone and would contrast nicely with any other colours I eventually use for the cobbles.

I experimented with some dry-brushing and quickly tossed that aside in favour of my trusty (but cheap) airbrush. And away we go:

The first step was actually to base coat the foam with a mixture of black paint and PVA. The foam will just absorb all the paint if you don't have the PVA to form a solid base.

I started by testing out 3 pieces to see if I liked the colours.

He's the re-animator, twisted re-animator.

So as most people know I'm a Resser player, but I've always steered clear of Nicodem. This was mainly because of how slow he looks to play and also the amount of models needed.

But no more, I'm now diving into the gentleman of the undead. Nicodem is my new master. Generally when I start a new master I just play them on repeat until something clicks. This time I'm going to try and share that process with everyone else.

I tend to do everything on a trial and error basis (emphasis on the error). The plan was to play a few games with the framework of what is my standard crew build and then adapt it to fit Nico as I progressed.

My first game looked like this.

Extraction: Take Prisoner, Leave Your Mark, Set Up, Mark For Death and Convict labour.
I chose to take Leave your mark and Mark for death. The thinking being that MFD would be simple to put on while around the Extraction marker and LYM would be good for when he pulled forward to reach the marker I could slip into the back lines.

I was up against Arcanists. More precisely Marcus.

I'm now going to run through my list and give a rough idea of why I took what.

The start of the table

After a few experiments with the types of terrain I wanted on my table I decided it was time to actually get back to some of the board making. First though, I needed a design. I had settled on having a somewhat modular board with individual tiles and roads.

I experimented quite a bit with roads and canals of varying widths and placements and eventually settled on this:

The green is not an indication of grass, but rather a quick way for me to eyeball the different regions.

The Full English GT

This is my write up of the recent English GT held at Wayland Games in Essex.

Before I start I will warn you this is not for the faint of heart or for those with a nervous disposition. There will be graphic references to playing very, very poorly along with gratuitous sulking. To help people avoid this any sulking and/or whining will be marked out in red.

So my first ever two day event and also the event I'd chosen as my gaming target this year. I wasn't feeling too confident going in due to being really out of practice, work and illness has meant that I've hardly played for the last few months.  So determined to give it a shot and have a couple of fun days of gaming I headed off to Sunny Hockley Saturday morning.

No hassle getting there and even time to run over to the cafe for a tea before standing about outside Wayland chatting to all the regular faces and a couple of new ones as well.

The doors opened and we all rushed in to join the queue (very British) to register with first time TO Stuart SNEZZLEY Snares and his better half Claire. We all received a very snazzy English GT bag containing our score sheets and some sweets. At which point people split into two groups. The people who think its OK the eat haribo for breakfast and the people who are wrong.

So onto game one.
Turf War
Me vs Graeme Nicholls
Molly vs Mah

So first game of the GT I'm facing gremlins on a table that has planets across it (I was beginning to think there was more than sugar in those sweets).
I was confident to start throwing Molly across the board for a turn one summon or two then some punk zombie action. It was all down hill from there...
The swarm of rooster riders sprinted down one side of the board to tie up my rogue necro and phil & nan while Molly and sybelle tried to hold the centre and scheme run at the same time.
Stupidly I tried to score Convict with 2 marker with in 3" of the centre line instead of vice-versa.
I got a couple of points for my necro being roostered to death but not much else
Finished 4-10. Really fun game and despite the loss I was almost happy with how I played.

Lunch! Wayland special. This time I opted for a cheese burger over the hot dog (I'm not sure if it makes any difference) Quick, easy and filling and then its back to the action.

- Quick run back to the cafe area for a top up of tea.

Game two.
Head Hunter
Me (again) vs SNEZZLEY. (TO pulling double duty as ringer)
Seamus vs Lucius

As relaxed of a game as you are ever likely to get at an event. Seamus shot things, Bete slashed things , Nekima tore through everything... Lucius wondered around looking posh and getting in the way. (He really is the David Cameron of Malifaux)
Finished 8-5 in my favour... I could say I played great but Stu was running Lucius if I'd lost I should of been handed the spoon there and then. Always a pleasure to play Stuart and it was nice to score some points.

Game three.
Collect the Bounty
Me (still) vs Anthony Fenton
Seamus vs Tara

Always a game to look forward to, I'm fairly sure Ant is my most played opponent this year facing off at about three Wayland events.
It started well Seamus took out a void wretch, necro punks got some markers down and student of sinew was in a position to flurry next turn...
It turns out that would be all I would succeed at this game. After Seamus and a shikome failing to make a mark on the nothing beast then the nothing beast vaporising the shikome and a necro punk.
Tara managed to be an effective scheme runner and also keep my models pinned down with slow before Sybelle killed then.
To sum up this game Anthony had no hand left Seamus took a shoot and two Ca at a belle, not a single one hit. the all missed by 1.
Final score 1-10 and a well deserved win for Tony and Tara.

End of Day one. Lots of sad farewells and wishes of good luck for those risking a night out in Southend, to be honest I didn't expect all of them to survive.

Day Two (I've never had a day two of an event before I'm very proud of myself for this mediocre achievement)

Starts off with a repeat of day one. Tea, chatting outside, a bit of a queue etc.

Game four.
Reconnoitre (my least favourite strat)
Me (just about) vs Kai Young
Molly vs McMourning

The plan here was to hold back use Molly and Datsue to swamp one side of the board while McM came to me... What is the first thing I did? Run Molly and Datsue off in different directions spreading my crew out too thin to do much of anything. (I'm a bloody genius)
Kai (Mr ranking himself) Did a great job of keeping his models in just the right position to score and other than me killing McM he had the upper hand the whole game.
Great game right to the end despite my inability to score points.
3-10 to Kai.

Lunch!!! Once again a copy of day one but this time I also spent some money in the shop and put my crew out for the painting comp.

Game five. The Final
Extraction
Me (I think) vs The one and only Ben Panzer Harris.
Molly vs Hoffman

I knew going into this game that it would be brutal, neither Panzer or Guild are known for their subtlety.
But the the power looped burning train of death that is the rail golem smashed into Molly turn 2. I quickly soulstones keeping her alive (barely) The come back never quite happened due to an inability to draw a crow or any card above an eight.

went through all my
It was great to finally get to play Ben, even if it meant being destroyed. (not unexpected really)
Finished up 1-9 to Mr Harris.

And that was it five games over two day done. There were prizes given out but I have no idea who won what if you really want to know pop over to the rankings and the results will be there somewhere.

I have to say it was a great weekend and really well run by Stuart (more likely Claire did all the hard work)
I learned a few lessons, mainly pay attention to whats happening, choose schemes you actually think you can do and remember the bloody plan.
Also whine about cards and luck less (this maybe a separate rant in the near future) and realize earlier that because of a dodgy tooth you've been spitting when you talk all weekend and you really shouldn't be allowed out in public.

Thanks to everyone for the games and the chat and everything else I've forgotten.
I think it's time to put away Molly and Seamus for a while they've had a good run this year. Next up will be some Nicodem with a bit of Marcus thrown in for variety.

If you liked the sound of this remember there is a Scottish GT coming up that you should all check out and plenty more events to try out as well.

Guild balls up - Match report.

Fishermen vs Union 
Conor vs Peter

Warning this is more like a rough overview than a proper report as I have no memory or the will to put that much effort in.

Now this is a rematch that's been played a few times me and Conor have faced off 3 or 4 times each time his slippery fish have gotten the better of me but now with unstoppable Mist called up for the Union I was hoping for a better result.

Union (the good guys... Well we're OK)
Blackheart
Coin
Gutter
Decimate
Hemlocke
Mist

Fishermen (I'm just saying they look shifty, you shouldn't trust them)
Shark
Salt
Gutter
Fangtooth
Greyscales
Jac

I got to kick off and chose Hemlocke to do the honours, she managed to kick straight and lodge the ball up against a convenient rock.
Out runs Jac who grabs the ball and lays it off to Gutter who skips along with possession.
Hemlocke smells fishy Gutter coming and lobs a blind to hold her up.
True gutter sprints up but can't get close enough to do much. Blackheart  runs off after Greyscales and Decimate holds the back line.
Fishy Gutter drops the ball in favour of taking a few swings at her mirror self... Blood everywhere Proper Gutter and Hemlocke have taken lots of damage.

Shark feeling left out runs up grabs the ball hits Honest Gutter guts her dodges away, back flips into a double pike and slams the ball into the Union goal.

Fishermen 4 - 0 Union

Ball flies out and is grabbed by Decimate. Trouty Gutter finishes off Princess Gutter

Fishermen 6 - 0 Union

In a rage Blackheart barrels into Greyscales and due to the tears in his eyes from seeing Mrs Gutter torn apart he managed to fluff attacks and not do more than a flesh wound to the old man.

Hemlocke took this as an excuse to leg it and

try to hide from fish Fangtooth Shark took a dislike to decimate and went to let her know about it, relieving her of the ball in the process and taking a cheeky shot while he was there...

Fishermen 10 - 0 Union

The cowering Hemlocke was soon hunted down by the stinking Fangtooth and slapped through the floor.

Fishermen 12 - 0 Union

Over in a blink but as always great fun. Still finding me feet with Guild Ball but no excuse I was thoroughly out played by Conor from the first turn.

But next time I'll surprise everyone and only lose 12-4 (If I'm lucky)